Santa to Banta: Name 5 animals living in the water?
Banta: 1 Frog.
Santa: Theek hai aur char(4)?
Banta: Frog da praah, bhen, piyo te maa

Banta: Meri biwi mujhe chod ke chali gayi.
Santa: Tu uska khyal nahi rakhta hoga.
Banta: Arre yaar, Sagi behan ki tarah rakhta tha

Santa: Qutub Minar kahan hai?
Pappu: Pata nahi.
Santa: Kabhi ghar se nikla karo.
Pappu: Ram Lal kaun hai?
Santa: Pata nahi.
Pappu: Kabhi Ghar me bhi raha karo

How do you recognize Santa’s son, Pappu, in School?
A: He is the one who erases the books when the teacher erases the board.

dare hue jaasus ko kya kahege

spyder man cause spy(jasoos) dar(dar gaya)

An elephant falls in luv wid an Ant.but Ant’s parents r against their
Marriage…guess y??

They gave a solid reason…Ladke k daat bahar hai**

Ones sardarji saw a very sohni kudi in the market. What he thought ?

kash ki ye meri maa hondi to main v inna sohna Honda..

A Teacher lecturing on population - In India after every 10 sec a women gives birth to a kid. Sardarji stands up - we must find & stop her!

A teacher told all students in a class to write an essay on a cricket match. All were busy writing except one Sardarji. He wrote “DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH!”

Sardar at an Art Gallery: I suppose this horrible looking thing is what you call modern art ?Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, thats a mirror!

Ek sardar ke bagiche mein bahut sare ped - paude thay, Sardar naukar ko bola
ped-paudon ko pani dal.
Naukar : sahab baarish ho rahi hai.
Sardar: abe to chatri leke dal.

After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, “You
know, I
was a fool when I married you.”
The husband replied, “Yes, dear, but I was in love and

didn’t notice.”

A little boy asked his father, “Daddy, how much does
it cost
to get married?”
The father replied, “I don’t know son, I’m still
paying.”

Sardar wins 20 cr from Rs. 20 lottery ticket. Dealer gave him 11 cr after deducting tax.

Angry Sardar: “Give me 20 cr or else return my 20 Rs back.!

Sardar : I hav’nt slept all nite in the train.

Friend : why?

Sardar : Got upper berth.

Friend : why didn’t you exchange?

Sardar : Oye, there was nobody to exchange in the lower berth..

One Sardar was enjoying Sun on a Beach in UK.

A lady came and asked him, ” Are you relaxing”
Sardar answered ‘” No I am Banta Singh”

Another Guy Came and asked the same Question.
Sardar answered ” No No Me ! Banta Singh”

Third one came and asked the same
question, Sardar was totally annoyed and decided to
shift his place.

While walking he saw another Sardar
enjoying the Beach.

He went and asked him ” Are you Relaxing?”. The other Sardar was much educated and answered “Yes I am relaxing.

The Sardar slapped him on
his face and said “Idiot, they are all searching for you and you are sitting here”

Flash news:
A 2 seater plane crashed in a graveyard in punjab .

Local sardars have so far found 500 bodies and are still digging for more..

Sardar’s wish: when i die, i wana die like my grandpa who died peacefully in his sleep not screaming like all the passengers in the bus he was driving..

SARDAR:: Beta ye kaisi machis lay kar aaye ho ek bhi nahi jal rahi
SON :: kya baat kartay ho pappa sub check kar kay laya hoooon

This sardarji goes to see Jurassic Park and when the Dinosaurs start
approaching, he was hiding under his seat when his friend asks him ;kyon
sardarji, kya baat hai? Dar kyon lag raha hai cinema hi to hai.; Sardarji
replies ;Aadmi hoon aur akkal hai, pata hai ki cinema hai, lekin voh to
janwar hai, usko kya pata………..

A sardarji photographer is focusing a dead body’s face in a funeral function,
suddenly all dead persons relatives beat him. why? He said “SMILE PLEASE”

Aik Sardar Apnae Marriage Certificate ku 1 hour sae Dekh raha tha.
Begam Ai Booli, Tusi inni Dair Say Kia Dekh Rahe Hu?
Sardar Bola, Expiry Date Dekh raha hoon……

Q: Why do Sardars always smile during lightning storms?
A: They think their picture is being taken….

Q: Why can’t sardars dial 911?
A: They can not find the eleven on the phone.

Banta ek Sadhu se bola: ” Baba, meri biwi bahut pareshan karti hai, koi upay batao.”
Sadhu: “Beta, upaay hota to main sadhu kyun banta?”

Santa & Banta got tired of mobile & decide 2 use pigeons. 1day a pigeon
reaches Banta without message. Angry Banta calls Santa!
Santa: Oye, this was a missed call

Santa standing on platform suddenly jumps on the railway track.
Banta: Santa u’ll die.
Santa: U’ll die bcoz haven’t u heard train is coming on platform?

Frog: Tumhare paas dimaag nahin hai.
Santa: Hai.
Frog: Nahin hai.
Santa: Hai.
Frog: Nahin hai & jumps into the well.
Santa: Isme suicide karne waali kya baat thi.?

Preeto: Raat ko aap peeke gutter mein gir gaye the.
Banta: Kya bataoon, sub galat sangati ka asar hai, hum 4 dost… 1 bottle,
aur woh teeno kambhakt peeten nahin.

Santa:Q: Why dogs don’t marry?

BantaA: Because they are already leading a dog’s life!

Santa Singh while riding a cycle suddenly hit a girl!
The girl shouted: Ghanti nahi maar sakta tha!!!
Santa: Poori cycle to maar di ab ghanti alag se maroon??!!!

Santa Singh decided to start a chicken farm so he bought a hundred chicks to begin with.
A month later he returned to the dealer for another hundred chicks because all of the first lot had died.
Another month later he was back at the dealers for another hundred chicks, for the second lot had also died.
‘But I think I know where I’m going wrong,’ said Santa. ‘I think I’m planting them too deep.’

A Chinese pair accidentally had twins without getting married, Guess what they named them… Jo Hua, So Hua.

Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer. Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.

Sardar : Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright……………….

. Jab jab ghire badal teri yaad ayi,
Jab jhoom ke barsa sawan teri yaad ayi,
Jab-jab mein bhiga teri yaad ayi,
Ab raha nahin jata, Chatri Lauta de Bhai.