A day’s sorrow
October 12th, 2008 | by Vijayaraghav |
A day’s sorrow
The train strolls through
the sticky summer
like a Trojan horse
The searing wind
with invisible wings
drifted through
the blazing summer
Perspiration bloomed
like a wild flower
to ignite the feelings
While glancing through
the doomed periphery
blurred like focal amnesia
a placid loneliness bothered me
A day’s sorrow
is like the sorrow
of a cancer ward
25 Responses to “A day’s sorrow”
By writer on Oct 12, 2008 | Reply
why the sorrow?
By Vijayaraghav on Oct 12, 2008 | Reply
In such a blazing condition sorrow is an unknown element. Sometimes you feel alone among the crowd. That lone feeling make way for sorrow which is irreparable.
By sonia on Oct 12, 2008 | Reply
Summer heat can generate such feelings…..thought mumbai was having a great weather. lovely verses, vijay.tc.smile.
By Madhu Vamsi on Oct 12, 2008 | Reply
very well compared the Trojan horse with train. Loved this interesting write up of yours…
By Rajiv on Oct 13, 2008 | Reply
Well Vijay this one is gloomy but distinctive, yes a person does have dissimilar frame of mind, occasionally……pe rhaps this is one instance which you have very efficiently detained and confined it on paper…..Happy days.
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By Nishu's on Oct 13, 2008 | Reply
pls..throw away sorrow…..
By shiwani on Oct 13, 2008 | Reply
yeah… such moments come in everyone’s life…take away our ability to see and appreciate the beauty momentarily.once again… great work Mr.Nair.
By evocat on Oct 13, 2008 | Reply
Sorrow is a lifelong companion. It is also a feeling that allows you to understand the value of being happy. Be Happy, My Friend. Rgds Raj
By Shivaraman on Oct 13, 2008 | Reply
It is a bit heavy for me.I request you to give a few lines explaining the inner meaning in prose, for person like me to enjoy.Hope you understand my feeling.I like sorrow.It is a great feeling according to me.People prefer sweet in taste.But bitter is also a taste which is essential in our food.So as sparrow.If we do not understand the sadness, there is no value for happiness.
By Vijayaraghav on Oct 13, 2008 | Reply
Dear Shivaraman,
Mumbai is always running fast. The railways, the roads and even the pedestrians are running fast. Some see thrill in this fast life, some see sorrow. But there is no choice, to earn your bread and butter you have to strive hard. This is the background. Now come to the situaton i was in. Sometimes the over crowded local trains run fast without any break and sometimes it runs with so many breaks like signal failure and accidents etc. You can imagine the humidity of mumbai in October and the useless fans inside the train which work like fuel to fire. I was experiencing such an unbearable situation and my imagination passes through certain areas of disgust. In such a blazing condition, sorrow is an unknown element. In such situations you feel alone among the crowd. That lone feeling make way for sorrow which is irreparable.
By Shrihari on Oct 13, 2008 | Reply
Very well written as usual and the way you have done the comparison of sorrowness is beyond ones imagination. Thanks for commenting on my post
By Chandra on Oct 14, 2008 | Reply
Wonderfully expressed!!! If I was present, in front of you right now, I would pat you on the back and say, KUDOS! You have written with all you heart and it can be seen in the expression, well written! A suggestion…(Can I ever stop myself…? Hehe!)
While writing metaphors, avoid using the word “like”, cause it’s understood without it.
The train strolls through
the sticky summer
A Trojan horse
Sounds better and elsewhere too…
By Vijayaraghav on Oct 14, 2008 | Reply
In poem the rythm is more important. Sometimes we have to repeat some words for the sake of rhythm. Still i appreciate your suggestion and thanks for that.
By lalli on Oct 15, 2008 | Reply
hey vijay ..srry for being away from here ..:( jus hectic schedule..:(
btw asusual nice verses..hmmm sometimes we feel all alone even amidst everyone arnd us..sorrow..the feeling is always there..that too if we grow old..na..?maybe i’m feeling it often nowadays..getting old man..:(
By Sparsha . on Oct 15, 2008 | Reply
Nice poem friend. By the way r u a doctor? so many medical terms!
By Mac Dsouza on Oct 15, 2008 | Reply
its nice
By umbrella 22 on Oct 16, 2008 | Reply
oh my..u brought the over crowded train and the irritating humidity vividly thru ur verses. superb Vijay. Oh yes..i’m back. Had a good time and ty for ur welcome note. Hey..just read ur previous post on stock market. excellent study yaar. A scary situation indeed.
By Santosh n on Oct 18, 2008 | Reply
I can feel with you the agony that one experiences in the Mumbai locals on a hot and humid day. More than sorrow one feels the blood pounding on to your head invoking extreme feelings of disguist and anger due to one’s helplessness. Unique subject , gr8 thought. Regds
By Anagha Pande on Oct 18, 2008 | Reply
hmm..i went thru this agony jus a few days ago…by thw way, the cancer ward reminds me of Aleksandr Solzenitzyn…though i ve not read that book yet..
By Shrihari on Oct 19, 2008 | Reply
Have a look at my new post ” Horrified THREE Days in their life ” on Indian Aviation
By Shivaraman on Oct 20, 2008 | Reply
I was about to quote Alexander solzhenitsyn’s cancer ward,when the last word reminded of that.i am glad Anagha pande,has reflected the same.Thank you for your elaboration sir.It is wonderful
By ansyton on Oct 22, 2008 | Reply
Nice …Mr..Vijay….Unus ual piece from your side…
By Wu simin on Oct 31, 2008 | Reply
please be happy
By Surya Pratim on Oct 31, 2008 | Reply
If the poem got more attention, would have been a great instance of a great poem!…………… ……………….. ……………….. …….Sun!