Precious

The story goes that time ago; a man punished his 5-year old daughter for wasting a roll of expensive gold wrapping paper. Money was tight and he became even more upset when the child used the gold paper to decorate a box to put under the Christmas tree.

Nevertheless, the little girl brought the gift box to her father the next morning and said, this is for you, Daddy. The father was embarrassed by his earlier over reaction, but his anger lured again when he found the box was empty.

He spoke to her in a harsh manner, don’t you know, young lady when you give someone a present there’s supposed to be something inside the package?

The little girl looked up at him with tears in her eyes and said, oh, Daddy, Its Not Empty. I Blew Kisses Into Until It Was Full. Her father was crushed. He fell on his knees and put arms around his little girl, and He begged her to forgive him for his unnecessary anger.   An accident took the life of the child only a short time later and it is told that the father kept that gold box by his bed for all the years of his life. And whenever he was discouraged or faced difficult problems he would open the box and take out an imaginary kiss and remember the love of the child who had put it there.

In a very real sense, each of us as human beings have been given a golden box filled with unconditional love and kisses from our children, family, friends and God. There is not more precious possession anyone could hold.

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Dreams…..

Dream big to achieve big, this is something everyone tells you on an everyday basis. Not just as a student/professional even as a human being you are expected to perform and to deliver. No matter how good you perform your efforts often fall short of expectations. The reason behind this is pretty simple. Human desires are never fully satisfied. There is an insatiable hunger to achieve more. More in terms of money, status, power, luxuries and what not. We want everything in excess, only more and not less drives us. Dreams are like a constant pushing factor in everyone’s life. It sets you in a particular mind frame, one which never lets you to lose your idea of perfect life. It pushes you to exceed your limits, go beyond your physical and emotional limitations. It takes you away from the circumstances which mark your life. Dreams keep you motivated to look for higher things in life, igniting an urge to get hold of those things. One day you make those things a part of your own world. Dreams make you a winner. Having said that, dreams are not meant for the faint hearted. You need to take everything with a pinch of salt. While on one hand dreams keep you on a high it is those very dreams that if shattered can make your life come to an all time low. Dreams shatter too and when it happens it takes its toll on your mental and emotional well being. What if somebody comes between you and your dreams, of course you wouldn’t want it to happen but you can’t negate the fact that life with it twists and turns has little place for your dreams. Sometimes unfavourable circumstances make you fear dreams or worse still it can make you see dreams as nothing but an illusion. As a dreamer I’ll still tell you: ‘take a nap, catch a dream, it takes you ahead in your imagination’.

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15 ways to boost your child’s self-esteem

Self-esteem refers to how we feel about ourselves — our value and worth in our own opinion. The higher our self-esteem, the more confident we are. The same holds true for children. Those with higher self-esteem are happier, more co-operative and open to new things, more secure and loving than those with low self-esteem.

15 important parenting resolutions

What causes low self-esteem?

It stems from low self-confidence, insecurity, underachievement, anxiety and depression, and can result in attention seeking behaviour. More often than not, these children end up as loners.

Ways to boost your child’s self-esteem

~ Show your love

Let your children know you love them for who they are, not for what they do. Let them know they are special. Be spontaneous and affectionate. Give them lots of hugs and say ‘I love you’ often. Tell them you are proud of them, and value them unconditionally. Accepting a child regardless of his or her strengths and weaknesses is a very important part of expressing unconditional love.

~ Spend time with them

Although it may not be possible to spend a lot of time each day, it is necessary to spend a minimum of 20 minutes daily, with each child, individually. Keep in mind though, that your child should have your undivided attention during these 20 minutes. Do something you both enjoy.

~ Be a positive role model

A child’s behaviour mirrors a parent’s. So, the more positive the parents’ self-esteem, the more positive the child’s too. If you are harsh on yourself, pessimistic, or unrealistic about your abilities and limitations, your child may eventually mirror your expectations. Nurture your own self-esteem, and your child will have a great role model.

Can your child take smart decisions?

~ Encourage your child

Honest encouragement is the quickest way to build a person’s self-esteem. Find some way to encourage your child every day. Make sure it is realistic and honest. Whenever possible, encourage your children to try something new, even if they are not successful at it. If need be, give them a task you know can be completed just so you can encourage them. Focus on the positive aspects of your child’s behavior. Even if you don’t like some of the behavior, find something positive to focus on.

~ Listen to your child

When your child shares something with you, give your undivided attention and listen carefully. It may be childish stuff to you, but it is very important to your child. Don’t offer advice unless it is asked for or if you feel your child’s safety is involved. Don’t ridicule or shame your children.

~ Show them they are important

Show your children what they do is important to you. Talk about their day’s activities, interests, and schoolwork. Get to know their friends. Attend their sports days, parent’s day at school, annual days or any other events they may be part of. Be available to support them always.

~ Give positive, accurate feedback

A comment such as, ‘You always scream while talking!’ will cause a child to start believing he or she doesn’t know how to speak politely. Instead, try something like ‘You were really angry, but I appreciate that you didn’t hit anyone.’ This acknowledges your child’s feelings and rewards the choices made, encouraging him or her to make the right choice again the next time.

~ Create a safe, nurturing home environment

A child who does not feel safe at home will suffer immensely from low self-esteem. A child who is exposed to parents who fight and argue repeatedly may become depressed and withdrawn. Always remember to respect your child and provide a happy environment.

~ Allow your child to help

Activities that encourage co-operation rather than competition are especially helpful in boosting self-esteem. For example, allowing your older child to help with a newborn baby or allowing your child to help you with simple household tasks will work wonders for the self-esteem.

~ Encourage spending time with other children

Invite children over and let your child decide what you should cook for them or the toys to be removed for sharing, etc. Look for activities with peers where your child can feel success and acceptance, such as participating in a sport or joining a class. Choose an activity that is appropriate for your child’s age. Let it be a fun time. These things will also teach your child basic social skills such as listening, taking turns while speaking, respect, co-operation and ways to make and maintain friendship.

~ Appreciate your child’s uniqueness

Don’t compare your child with siblings or even with any other child. All children are unique and have their own set of special abilities. Find your child’s strength and encourage him or her to build on that.

Parents, children and bedtime battles

~ Let your child try

Even if your children have difficulty with a new task or skill, don’t quickly take over and show them how to do it. Be patient and let them try. If need be, you can break up a difficult task. Simple steps help children see progress when learning a complex skill. Don’t embarrass your children by asking them to do difficult tasks in front of other people. When your children are learning new skills that take practice, such as riding a bicycle, don’t expect perfection the first time. Encourage them to practice and talk about their improvement with each practice session.

~ Use language that builds self-esteem

Speak to children with phrases that build self-esteem, such as, ‘Thank you for helping,’ or ‘That was an excellent idea.’ Avoid using negative phrases that decrease self-esteem such as ‘How many times have I told you?’ or ‘Why are you so stupid?’

~ Encourage your child to be a thinker

Encourage children to be creative by exploring ideas with them that are fun and interesting. Take them for field trips to places of their interest. Take part in their excitement about what they see and enjoy.

~ Have realistic expectations and goals for your child

When parents expect their children to do more than their age and level of maturity permits, they are disappointed again and again, thus sending a message to their children to be disappointed in themselves. Having realistic expectations provides children with a sense of control over their lives. This goes hand-in-hand with self-esteem, which increases as they achieve success when realistic and achievable goals are completed.

To conclude, although building self-esteem is a lifelong process, the foundation of self-esteem is established in childhood. This foundation will make a child face any hurdle in life with courage and confidence.

Posted in Education & Reference | 7 Comments

Balance Sheet of Life

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A KID WITHIN ME

A KID WITHIN ME…
With time i have grown
but all the while
i have known
There is a kid within me.

There is a kid within me
who doesnt want to grow
He doesnt wanna know
why does it pain to grow up & be wise.

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RELATIONSHIP SECRETS

ANNIVERSARIES

Always celebrate! Whether it’s the 1st or the 50th, each year together is a triumph.

APPRECIATION

Let each other know how much you appreciate each other. You may already know but hearing it from each other is always better.
BEST FRIENDS
Be best friends preferably before being boyfriend-girlfriend. Take time to know each other so the relationship will be a deep one. Tell each other about your crushes, dreams and problems. Make sure he/she is your best friend before getting engaged. The strong bond of friendship will help you both survive tough times.  BOND
Make it a point to spend time together often but leave room for each other. Also spend time alone w/ each other, so that at the end of the day you could both share your experiences. This way, you stay interesting with your partner.

CHANGING EACH OTHER
Don’t marry an as…le, j…. or a bi…. (an unsuitable person) You’ll never change each other.
COMPLIMENTS
Always compliment each other. This will prevent feelings of resentment & thinking that one is being taken for granted.
DATE
Keep doings things that you both enjoy, do them together. Make time & continue to date to keep the romance - look good, smell good to maintain physical attraction.

DIFFERENCES  Celebrate differences. Never force your ideologies down each other’s throat. Give up trying to turn your partner into you. Accept differences, appreciate them.

FIGHTS
Fight with aim to resolve the issue. Don’t outdo each other. The longer you extend the fight. The more chances that you’ll say something hurtful that you don’t really mean. As mad as you were w/ your partner, he/she is still the person who laughs at your jokes & thinks you’re hot. Hear each other out, don’t dig up old issues. Choose your battles. Make sure the fight will be worth it & that something will change in the relationship as a result of the fight.

FLAWS
Know that the perfect person does not exist. Know that just as there are things that you love about him/her, there will be things that will make you go crazy. We are only human with our own flaws.
FUN
Have fun together! This means keeping the fun & spontaneity that was there in the early days. Allow yourselves to get silly - shower together, pee w/the door open etc. Being able to make each other laugh & see the lighter, crazier, absurd side is the best way to get through all the differences in personalities, adjustments in lifestyle & opposing viewpoints.
GOALS  Make sure you have similar goals. It would be difficult to keep your bond intact if your views are complete opposite.
GRUDGES
Quit tabulating grudges. Let it off. Discuss it, then trash it, don’t recycle it.
KEEPING IT HOT
Keep it hot by traveling to diff. places together. A new setting will do wonders. Always have skin contact - be it holding hands, a massage or just plain leg rubbing.  HONESTY
Don’t lie or hide things. The problem will only get bigger.
KNOW EACH OTHER
Learn each other’s interest. It really keeps the conversation flowing!
HUG
A hug can be far better more intimate than a kiss.
IDENTITY
Don’t lose your personality - that’s why he/she fell in love with you. Have separate interest & activities to keep your individual, & to be able to contribute more to the relationship.
INDEPENDENCE
Having your own income means you’re the boss in your life.
IN-LAWS
Make rooms for the in-laws.
INTENTIONS
Wish each other well. Don’t wish each other worst.
ISSUES
Speak up about the awkward stuff now, like money & sex. The earlier, the better.
LISTEN
Listen, listen, listen. Hear each other out especially during arguments.
LOOK GOOD
Mind your appearance! Stay fit & healthy for each other.
LOVE
It all boils down to your love, chemistry & respect for each other.
MEMORIES
Remind each other of the old days. Do something that you used to do for each other before. It may even be corny but it made you two together. Experience new things together- from dining into a new restaurant to experiencing street food together to exploring to new places. It’s the little surprises that make great memories.  MIND READING
No matter how long you’ve been together, do not think that you can read each other’s mind.
NEEDS
Be good to yourself, then be good to your partner. That’s what love is all about. Think about your partner. Will it make him/her happy?
Will she/he enjoy it? Consider each other’s feelings. Be very attentive & sensitive to each other’s needs, physically & emotionally, that way your partner learns to do the same for you. Never take your partner for granted.
PRIORITIES
If one says it’s important, then it is! Prioritize each other among other things!
SPACE
Give each other space. Have dates with your girlfriends, have your boy’s night out. If you can’t trust each other with this, then don’t get married.

SORRY
Say sorry when you’re wrong.
SURPRISES
No matter how long you’ve known each other, be open to surprises, both good or bad.
TEAMWORK
Think for two & always work as a team. Consult each other before making a decision because everything will always affect both of you. Strengthen couple power. In many ways, we have to decide based on what is best for the relationship in favor of our individual selves.
SUPPORT
Support each other’s dream. Be willing to follow your passions, support your partner in his/her decisions & create new ones together. Two heads are better than one.
TALK

Tell each other’s stories. Life goes by so fast & its easy to see how easily couple can grow apart. Whenever something funny, scary, exciting or juicy happened to you or to someone you know, tell each other about it & have your partner do the same. Keep each other in the loop of life, even by email if you have to.

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No God or Know God??

  An atheist professor of philosophy speaks to his class on the problem Science has with God, The Almighty.

He asks one of his new students to stand and…..

Prof: So you believe in God?

Student: Absolutely, sir.

Prof: Is God good?

Student: Sure.

Prof: Is God all-powerful?

Student: Yes.

Prof: My brother died of cancer even though he prayed to God to heal him.

Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But God didn’t. How is this God good then? Hmm? (Student is silent.)

Prof: You can’t answer, can you? Let’s start again, young fellow. Is God good?

Student: Yes.

Prof: Is Satan good?

Student: No.

Prof: Where does Satan come from?

Student: From…God.. .

Prof: That’s right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?

Student: Yes.

Prof: Evil is everywhere, isn’t it? And God did make everything. Correct?

Student: Yes.

Prof: So who created evil?

(Student does not answer.)

Prof: Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don’t they?

Student: Yes, sir.

Prof: So, who created them?

(Student has no answer.)

Prof: Science says you have 5 senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Tell me, son…Have you ever seen God?

Student: No, sir.

Prof: Tell us if you have ever heard your God?

Student: No, sir.

Prof: Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God, smelt your God? Have you ever had any sensory perception of God for that matter?

Student: No, sir. I’m afraid I haven’t.

Prof: Yet you still believe in Him?

Student: Yes.

Prof: According to empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, science says your GOD doesn’t exist. What do you say to that, son?

Student: Nothing. I only have my faith.

Prof: Yes. Faith. And that is the problem science has.

Student: Professor, is there such a thing as heat?

Prof: Yes.

Student: And is there such a thing as cold?

Prof: Yes.

Student: No sir. There isn’t.

(The lecture theatre becomes very quiet with this turn of events.)

Student: Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat. But we don’t have anything called cold. We can hit 458 degrees below zero which is no heat,

but we can’t go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of heat. We cannot measure cold.

Heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.

(There is pin-drop silence in the lecture theatre.)

Student: What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?

Prof: Yes. What is night if there isn’t darkness?

Student: You’re wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have low light, normal light, bright light, flashing light….But if you have no light constantly, you have nothing and its called darkness, isn’t it? In reality, darkness isn’t.

If it were you would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn’t you?

Prof: So what is the point you are making, young man?

Student: Sir, my point is your philosophical premise is flawed.

Prof: Flawed? Can you explain how?

Student: Sir, you are working on the premise of duality. You argue there is life and then there is death, a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure.

Sir, science can’t even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one.

To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life: just the absence of it. Now tell me, Professor. Do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?

Prof: If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, yes, of course, I do.

Student: Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?

(The Professor shakes his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument is going.)

Student: Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavour, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a scientist but a preacher?

(The class is in uproar.)

Student: Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor’s brain?

(The class breaks out into laughter.)

Student: Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor’s brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established rules of empirical, stable, demonstrable protocol, science says that you have no brain, sir.

With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures, sir?

(The room is silent. The professor stares at the student, his face unfathomable. )

Prof: I guess you’ll have to take them on faith, son.

Student: That is it sir… The link between man & god is FAITH.

That is all that keeps things moving & alive…….

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Link between money and happiness

Research has told us about the link between money and happiness. Essentially, more money makes you happier until you’re comfortable, and then, it really doesn’t do much good. Interestingly though, a study that looked at how happy a number of similarly earning young people were, found that the happier ones went on the make more money later in life.If money doesn’t buy happiness, what does? Grandma was right when she told you to value health and friends, not money and stuff. Or as Diener and Seligman put it, once your basic needs are met "differences in well-being are less frequently due to income, and are more frequently due to factors such as social relationships and enjoyment at work." Other researchers add fulfillment, a sense that life has meaning, belonging to civic and other groups, and living in a democracy that respects individual rights and the rule of law. If a nation wants to increase its population’s sense of well-being, says Veenhoven, it should make "less investment in economic growth and more in policies that promote good governance, liberties, democracy, trust and public safety."Curiously, although money doesn’t buy happiness, happiness can buy money. Young people who describe themselves as happy typically earn higher incomes, years later, than those who said they were unhappy. It seems that a sense of well-being can make you more productive and more likely to show initiative and other traits that lead to a higher income. Contented people are also more likely to marry and stay married, as well as to be healthy, both of which increase happiness.It’s not only the case that money doesn’t buy happiness, being materialistic is also associated with worse mental health and overall adjustment.

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7 don’ts after a meal

 *     Don’t smoke- Experiment from experts proves that smoking a cigarette after meal is comparable to smoking 10 cigarettes (chances of   cancer is higher).    
         
*     Don’t eat fruits immediately - eating fruits after meals will cause stomach to be bloated with air. Therefore take fruit 1-2 hr after meal or 1hr before meal. 
*     Don’t drink tea - Because tea leaves contain a high content of acid. This substance will cause the Protein content in the food we consume to be hardened thus difficult to digest.
 
*    Don’t loosen your belt - Loosening the belt after a meal will easily cause the intestine to be twisted &blocked.
     
*    Don’t bathe - Bathing will cause the increase of blood flow to the hands, legs & body thus the amount of blood around the stomach will therefore decrease.  This will weaken the digestive system in our stomach.          
*    Don’t walk about - People always say that after a meal walk a hundred steps and you will live till 99. In actual fact this is not true. Walking will cause the digestive system to be unable to absorb the nutrition from the food we intake.         
*     Don’t sleep immediately - The food we intake will not be able to digest properly. Thus will lead to gastric & infection in our intestine.  

Posted in Health, Fitness & Beauty | 1 Comment

A Powerful Life…..I

"There are two kinds of people in the world, those who count and those who do not. The vast majority are of those who do not count. They are born; they grow to maturity; they eat, drink, sleep and work; they marry and are given in marriage; they laugh and are happy, and they are sick and miserable in turn; they die, and except as they leave behind them children to do as they have done it is as if they had never lived at all. They are the children of circumstance, the creatures of environment. Their lives are ordered for them by custom and habit; they think the thoughts and imitate the actions of those with whom they chance to be associated. They exercise no power beyond that which is common to their fellows; they leave no footprints on the sands of time. When the census is taken they are counted; but in so far as a really distinct individuality is concerned they do not count. It would answer as well to take their census in blocks of ten as one by one; or to reckon them by the hundred like sheep, for sheep have almost as much individuality as they. They may be more or less happy, more or less useful, more or less successful; but even though they gain wealth they do not count, for their riches do not give them a distinct personality."

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